Present
Moment, Sacred Moment:
The Choir Chapel of the Friars in Kilkenny where we first learned to practice Meditation. |
Our fingers couldn’t find the right page yet in the breviary. We were still learning the geography of the friary and the gardens; still learning which of the brothers did what, and how to speak to them about it.
We were new to the robe and new to the sandals, all clumsy thumbs and cold toes; and every day we joined
the professed community for meditation; twice, two periods of half an hour
before Lauds (morning prayer) and Vespers (evening prayer). These are the two periods of
stillness that, as we were to learn, are the ancient hinges on which, to this
day, swings the door of monastic meditative prayer, the door that slowly opens
you to the presence of the One who IS…
But we were
novices, new, and so as yet those periods were spent trying to resist
distraction, trying not to look at the clock, trying not to fall asleep, or, if
one did fall asleep, trying to do so in such a way that the Novice Master
wouldn’t notice! Sometimes they were even spent keeping one eye open and scanning the faces of
the professed brothers who seemed, effortlessly, to sink into a profound
silence and stillness that had a quality of presence and peace to it that we as
yet could barely fathom. We soon recognised that amongst the brethren there was one brother whose
silence spoke to us novices louder than any of the books on meditation we had
been given. He would enter the choir, (the wood panelled private chapel of the
friary), with the rest of the brothers, make his genuflection toward the Blessed
Sacrament and then he would simply... sit. His body folding into prayer with the
ease of a well oiled mechanism seemed so used to these movements from countless
repetitions. He sat a little forward, his spine straight, his eyes closed, his
hands deftly folded in his lap, his breathing so deep it was barely
perceptible. He was alert and relaxed, peaceful and dynamic, still and yet
vibrating with energy. His name was Brother Berard; and he was, we novices
agreed amongst ourselves, the best at all this... and probably a saint to boot.
The late Brother Berard who taught Meditation and Contemplative practice to us as Novices |
So you can
imagine our excitement when a few weeks later our Novice Master told us that we
would be taking lessons in meditation with Br. Berard. We talked about what we
would ask him, mentally got our questions ready, and spent quite a few
meditation periods surrepticiously studying him closely. Finally the morning came. We gathered
around the table in the novitiate classroom. He came in quietly, said a short prayer invoking the Holy Spirit, Our Lady and St. Francis as was always the custom before a talk and then he sat with us. We were silent. He glanced at us with bright eyes that belied his age, steepled his hands,
looked at the ground, and in his slow deep voice asked us what we understood by
the word “meditation”. It was as though a dam had burst! Questions, comments, theories
tumbled out of us born of our few weeks of frustrated, distracted “practice”.
When at last we were done, Brother Berard, who had not moved throughout, regarded us for a
moment in silence and gently said, “Sons, meditation is simply closing your
eyes and getting out of God’s way.” We
were stunned, we had expected techniques, secrets, teachings…it was to be a few
months before we were to realise that in that one single sentence we had
received all of that and more besides.
As the weeks went on Brother Berard did
teach us deeply; we encountered our minds and their multiple layers, we dwelt
in our breath, learned to recognise both distractions and the touches of grace that came in their midst and often despite them, and we were
taught not to get attached to either, letting each simply arise, be and depart. We learned the ancient techniques for
centering our attention, becoming mindful, stilling the thoughts, and becoming
present to the One who IS always present to us in love. We were slowly learning
to get out of God’s way… something I am still learning to do to this day. What
sounded simple on that winter’s morning in the Novititate seems now to be the
work of a lifetime and the discipline that truly allows one to be a real
disciple is one that must be embraced daily and even begun again in every moment.
Now
that I find myself teaching others the way of mindfulness, the way of
meditative prayer in the Christian tradition, I hear myself quoting Brother
Berard often! His words and, above all, the example of his practice still invite
me to deepen my own stillness, mindfulness and presence so as to encounter Divine Presence, and it is to his
memory, and the memory of countless brothers with whom I have been blessed to
share so many moments of meditation and prayer, that I dedicate this blog.
In the
coming days and weeks I hope to share with you some of the basic
insights, teachings and techniques of the Christian meditative mindful
tradition and invite you to practice these ancient forms of prayer that allow
us to get out of God’s way in our own lives…
Until the next time,
Peace and Joy to you and yours always...
Brother Richard
Wonderful. Thank you. Blessings
ReplyDeleteWhat beautifully written and inspiring words. Looking forward to many more. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteWhat beautifully written and inspiring words. Looking forward to many more. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteWhat beautifully written and inspiring words. Looking forward to many more. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful, Brother Richard. Thank you :)
ReplyDelete